Nightwing’s Confession
Summary:Taking place between Intervention and Summit, Nightwing finally reveals the truth about Kaldur and Artemis to the rest of the Team before having a nervous breakdown. Inspired by Maya Matlin breaking down on the Degrassi episode "Zombie part 2"
A/N: I used the Young Justice wikia for most of the info. I'm not a Degrassi fan but while researching nervous breakdowns, I thought Maya Matlin's breakdown would be the perfect inspiration because like Maya, Nightwing doesn't show any pain, at least not on camera. He has to crack at some point. Originally, I wanted Zatanna to trigger Nightwing's breakdown and hug hug him afterwards because she was unknowingly used by him. Instead I chose Batgirl because her behavior towards him like in Young Justice #25, Beneath, & Before The Dawn, is needed to cause the breakdown. I know Nightwing's rant is long but what he says will help you understand his struggles.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Young Justice, the Young Justice wikia, and Degrassi.
After La'gaan went to his room, Nightwing whispers to M'gaan. "Listen. Can you tell Wally to come here on June 16 for me, please? We argued after the Cave's destruction and I think he might still be mad at me. Kaldur and Artemis will also be here to confess the truth with me and plan our next move."
M'gaan was surprised that the 2 best friends would fight. She agrees, hoping it would take her mind off her break-up with La'gaan and the Wendy Harris thing.
On June 16, the entire Team were in the warehouse. Rocket and Zatanna were also present after Nightwing asked them to attend but didn't say why.
"The entire Team will be infiltrating the summit being held by the Light and the Reach on June 19 in Santa Prisca but we need to plan this out quietly," Nightwing announces softly.
"Oh yeah! Finally! This is going to be so crash!" cheered Impulse who high fives Blue Beetle.
"Can't wait to finally take out Aqualad!" exclaimed Beast Boy. Nightwing loudly whistles for them to be quiet.
He then softly said, "You actually can't take him AND Tigress out..."
"Wait, what? Why?" asks Mal.
"And why are me and Zee here if this isn't League business?" asked Rocket before Nightwing sighed.
"Before I tell you why, I need to apologize in advance for what you're about to hear, especially Robin, Batgirl, and Zatanna." The 3 aforementioned people suddenly became uncomfortable while Nightwing pauses for a few seconds.
"I know you'll all be angry and hurt but the secrecy was necessary. The short story is that Kaldur isn't a traitor but on a deep cover mission and Artemis isn't dead but is disguised as Tigress," said Nightwing who lets the news sink in.
Those who didn't know freaked out. La'gaan and Conner stared at him with their arms crossed and scoffed because they were still mad about what M'gaan went through. The 2 guys promised Nightwing to keep the plan a secret from the others since the day M'gaan was kidnapped. They also promised M'gaan not to spoil the confession and let Nightwing explain himself.
"How could you not trust us?! Do you know how much pain you've caused?!" Bumblebee exclaimed angrily. Reactions and criticism quickly followed from the others.
"Ahem! We were involved in this too, you know!" Artemis said loudly as she came in with Wally and Kaldur. Everyone was shocked when they turned around. The girls quickly surround and hug Artemis who's still in her Tigress uniform. She's holding her mask and the glamour charm in one hand and holding Wally's hand with the other.
"Please be quiet and no unnecessary interruptions. M'gaan will show everything so that you will have a better understanding. Then we need to plan how to infiltrate the summit and clear the Justice League's name," said a stern Kaldur.
The Team glared at their leader. Wally was still fuming about Nightwing's actions. He already knew that Blue Beetle had become a Reach agent from watching GBS but didn't know about everything else until M'gaan told him. Kaldur, Artemis, and M'gaan stood between Wally and Nightwing before M'gaan connected everyone's minds into a mindscape of the inside of a circus tent.
"Uh why are we in a circus tent?" asked Blue Beetle. The originals, Robin, and Batgirl knew the answer.
"It's my memory. I'm mostly to blame for this ordeal," Nightwing said bluntly. M'gaan, Kaldur, and Artemis put their hands on his shoulders to express their support for him.
The first flashback was the session between Black Canary and Nightwing, then 13 years old.
"The first time Artemis 'died' was 6 years ago during an alien invasion simulation. We knew it wasn't real but weren't told that it was a doomed to fail mission. When Artemis 'died', Ms. M's subconscious took control from her uncle and made us think it was real. We almost didn't wake up. I became leader after Kaldur 'died' too. We were so traumatized that we each had private counseling with Black Canary," said a solemn Nightwing before the conversation played.
The originals, including Wally, never knew what was exactly said until now. The conversation made Robin nervously gulp because Nightwing always tried to push him out of his comfort zone so that he could prove himself despite Robin's low self-confidence.
"It haunted me throughout this deception because I knew who I was turning into while putting you guys in danger for the sake of the mission," sighed Nightwing after the conversation ended. That admission stunned Wally because he thought he wasn't aware of it. Robin was worried about having to face a similar scenario himself one day.
"Later that same year, we found out that Red Arrow was a Cadmus clone who was unknowingly programmed infiltrate the League and put them under Vandal Savage's control. The risk of another mole was why this plan was done in absolute secrecy," explained Nightwing as the scene showed Kaldur and Nightwing shaking hands with each other in front of Tula's hologram. Artemis then takes over.
"Kaldur used his grief over Tula's death to infiltrate the Light and learn more about the Reach by working for his dad while Nightwing became leader. I didn't know until later when Kaldur said he needed help. He 'killed' me so he could secure his position to the Light and I could become Tigress. My skills made me the perfect choice but I would go if Wally was in on it. I wasn't forced to go because Nightwing knew how much Wally and I wanted to live a normal life after Tula's death," she said before her tone became defensive and her eyes narrowed because she didn't appreciate Nightwing being the main target of criticism simply because Batman was off planet.
"You guys are lucky that you didn't have to carry this burden. If you knew, you would've blown our cover under pressure or held back during fighting, making the Light suspicious. We specifically kept M'gaan out because if Psimon mentally detected her presence like he did during our first encounter with him 6 years, he would've exposed us and made us lose our memories. He also would've mentally probed you guys."
Sensing that she got her point across based on the looks on their faces, a series of memories of how the ruse was pulled off were shown. Upon being shown how Artemis was disguised, Zatanna wanted to slap Nightwing across his face because she couldn't believe she had been used like that, especially since they remained good friends after breaking up. But she couldn't bring herself to do so because she could also see the sad expression on his face.
"I've made difficult decisions as well," Kaldur said solemnly as the memory of him punching Nightwing in the stomach appeared. "I had to choose between saving the Kroloteans or my friends on Malina Island. La'gaan wasn't supposed to have been caught. My father said that an altitude-sensing bomb that was smuggled on board before launch destroyed the comsat. It was to test if I would account for my faults in case of failure and I passed. Before destroying the Cave, I managed to secretly pass a flash drive to Nightwing which included information on the abductees and La'gaan's location."
The next memory was Wally and Nightwing's argument after Mount Justice was blown up. Nightwing's decisions created strong mixed feelings among Team members, especially La'gaan, Impulse, Blue Beetle, and Beast Boy because the Reach experimented on them. The argument shocked Artemis the most because she never thought the 2 best friends would argue with each other like that. Kaldur simply stared at the flashback with wide eyes upon hearing the triple agent accusation and then briefly glanced at Wally with a frown.
The memory changes to show M'gaan's confrontation with Kaldur on board the Reach ship. She explain, "I've been abusing my powers which ultimately lead to me attacking Kaldur's mind and discovering the truth. I eventually told Conner about it when he visited me at my uncle's apartment in Chicago. I told him not to tell because I thought it would make things worse even though things did get worse later on."
The next memory showed Conner and La'gaan being told the truth before changing to show Connor scolding Nightwing outside La'gaan's room. The scene changes to show Artemis, Kaldur, Cheshire and Sportsmaster looking up at a levitating M'gaan.
"After Kaldur was cured, I got a full explanation, including that I was kidnapped after Artemis drugged Psimon to maintain cover and made sure he was catatonic until after the upcoming summit," M'gaan said. "Kaldur then played possum until we could figure out how I can escape. Suddenly Sportsmaster and Cheshire came to avenge Artemis's death but they stopped and even helped us retain cover when we showed them the truth."
M'gaan had already told Nightwing about her time on the Manta-Sub and how she escaped before she helped him search for the missing Team.
"Wait. Why would they avenge you?" Wonder Girl asked Artemis.
She sighed and explained, "They're my dad and my sister. My mom was Huntress but she retired and changed so that I could have a better life. Dad only came to protect his rep but my sister came to avenge me." She smiled slightly, shaking her head, and rolling her eyes at that last part.
Those who didn't know about Artemis's family were shocked but Kaldur ensured them that she would've never been allowed on the Team 6 years ago if she couldn't be trusted.
The final flashback shows M'gaan and Nightwing searching for the Team in the Warworld while engaged in a guilt-off. She tells him that they both have to get over themselves, save the Team, and fix Blue. She then reminds him what his 13 year old self once said: that's just what we do.
Everyone suddenly found themselves back in the warehouse. Wally was silent throughout the whole thing, rethinking about their fight at the hall of Justice. By the time the flashbacks were done, everyone had already softened their hard looks, even Wally, Conner, and those who were held captive on the Reach ship.
"Look. I'm not being emotionally manipulative. I do regret not being able to tell you guys. I don't expect you guys to quickly forgive like Ms. M was or even forgive at all but please understand that I tried to rethink this over to try to find another way and this was it," said a tired looking Nightwing.
The Team never expected him to tell them everything. A concerned Conner was the first to speak, saying, "Maybe you should rest. You look tired and I can hear your heart rate steadily increase."
"But the summit and Rimbor-"
"You can't think properly in this condition. We can work on it without you," Conner interrupted.
"Look. I'm fine. Just need some water, that's all. Besides, I want to make up for the pain I've caused," he calmly stated as he pinches the bridge of his nose, struggling to contain the inner demon that's been building up since the fallout between him and Wally.
Batgirl, who was a few steps away from the original 4 conspirators, quickly chided him before he could move forward. "Stop it, OK? It's scary to see you like this…"
"I can still be a part of the discussion. I've been in the hero biz since I was 9," he said as he rubbed his temples.
"Except you didn't have an ACTUAL alien invasion to deal with when you were 9." Nightwing crosses his arms in response but Batgirl refuses to back down.
"Listen to me. I know how much you want to end this but you can't keep beating yourself up and surrounding yourself in darkness!" she said with a little more force. Those words instantly trigger him.
"WHY NOT?!" he shouted at her at the top of his lungs as he dropped his arms and clenched his fists. His voice echoed through the warehouse as Batgirl took a step back. The Team was frozen in shock. They never recalled him being like this before. Before anyone could say anything, he took a quick deep breath and finally comes clean.
"My so called best friend since before the Team was founded, told Red Arrow that 'ditching the game doesn't mean ditching my friends' but after the Cave was destroyed, he didn't ask me if I was OK!" Nightwing shouted as he gestured to himself using his left hand. "Instead he flips out at me, then leaves when I needed him more than ever! It made me wish that I had taken Artemis's place so I could avoid hearing 'Artemis this Artemis that' even though I knew that Wally, who had the difficult task of consoling Artemis's mom, was legitimately worried and that the Team would fare worse without me!"
Wally suddenly remembered that failed intervention and Artemis suddenly remembered her internal monologue after M'gaan fried Kaldur's brain. They were also horrified like the others at the idea that he would consider secretly faking his own death if Artemis refused to help. Robin was the most affected because it essentially meant that he would've been left alone to lead the Team.
Nightwing begins panting briefly. He then throws his arms up and down and pulls at his hair ranting, "I feel like I'm never gonna be happy again because each day just gets worse and worse! I'm a 19 year old with no superpowers who has to lead a team of mostly superpowered beings, be Robin's role model, handle 2 double agents, assume Batman's duties while he's off-planet, patrol Bludhaven, and think about the fate of the world! I hate that this isn't a simulation and how some things went wrong! I hate acting like him by doing whatever it takes to stop the invasion, knowing that I would be called selfish and wouldn't be forgiven even if this whole thing was successful! Lying to my Team and the League, splitting up 2 of the most important people in my life, deceiving my ex-girlfriend, letting a few teammates get kidnapped, and sacrificing the Cave…Made me think how the originals and I never knew how easy we had it back then. All aster. No dis."
Robin hadn't felt this bad for anyone since that time he stared at Jason Todd's hologram. A frowning Wally remained quiet and stared at the ground. Despite already being overwhelmed with remorse, he lets the nervous breakdown continue.
Nightwing crosses his arms again and took another quick breath. His voice softened as a single tear rolled down each cheek. "I tried to stay whelmed but I dreamt that the Team and the League abandoned me before they died at the hands of the bad guys. The nightmares also included Wally beating me up into a bloody pulp and wishing that I never became his best friend because everything that went so wrong was my fault. I was so happy when Ms. M came back alive and woke me up."
This made Wally widen his eyes and slightly open his mouth when he turned to face Nightwing. He hoped that he was lying about the beating just to get even more sympathy but deep down he knew he wasn't milking it.
"Just because Artemis isn't my girlfriend doesn't mean she's just an asset to me. Before I gave her the necklace, I looked at the photo I took with her on her first day at Gotham Academy and repeated the exact same words to myself that I said to her just before taking it because she didn't know my real name back then. Ever since she agreed to this, I feared that my honorary big sister would never come back. When they kissed goodbye, I looked away because it hurt me so much. I knew Wally's outburst wasn't about his souvenirs, but his tone and timing frustrated me so much that I said it anyway..."
Artemis couldn't believe that he still had that photo and Wally couldn't believe how much Artemis meant to him. Nightwing drops his arms and sniffled as he finished his rant by bitterly adding in a cracked voice, "I didn't even get to apologize to him. I still want to even if he never wanted to talk to me again..."
Batgirl then quickly walks over and hugs Nightwing who hugs her back. They drop to the ground and Nightwing grabs Batgirl's back for dear life and sobs, releasing the hurt he's been holding back. He hadn't felt like this since the day he lost his family right before his eyes. The Team was heartbroken. They never expected their leader to be so open with his struggles. Wally, whom Nightwing never even looked at once during his nervous breakdown, slowly walks over to him and kneels.
"Dude, look," said a frowning Wally as he scratches the back of his neck. Batgirl lets go of Nightwing and steps back so that the 2 guys can have their personal space. "I'm so sorry for losing my cool. You don't need to apologize to me. I was so scared of losing Artemis that I didn't think about stressed out you were… sighs… some best pal I turned out to be..." he muttered. Nightwing manages to slowly somewhat get a hold of himself and they hug each other.
"It's alright… Besides isn't questioning each other's objectivity is what best pals do?" sighed Nightwing which Wally chuckled at, remembering when he was left behind during Dick's personal mission with Haly's Circus. The 2 reconciled best friends let go and got up.
"Oh and sorry for doubting your loyalty," said Wally as he turns to face Kaldur.
"I accept your apology," replied Kaldur. "Your concerns were understandable because it is not easy to put the love of your life in danger after trying to avoid it."
"Can I say something?" Robin quickly interjected. "Not sure about the others but you explained yourself. I forgive you."
Zatanna follows his lead. "Your hands were tied so me too."
"You did this to protect us and keep those two safe so me three," said Batgirl who puts her hand on his shoulder and gestures to the 2 smiling double agents.
"Me four...chum," said a smiling La'gaan. The others quickly followed suit.
"Thanks guys. Is that all?" asked Nightwing who wiped away his tears.
With no more responses left, Zatanna wished good luck to Artemis before leaving the warehouse with Rocket via Zeta-Tube. The Team finally begins to draft the first part of the plan: taking out Deathstroke...